My Issues with Facebook

Facebook is a farce. It's like a magicians trick to make people think they are involved in other people's lives, when, really, it's just an act. Most people don't post on Facebook the things they are really struggling with, and if they do, how do comments help? Facebook is replacing the actual physical interactions between people, but it's not an equal trade.

Did you know hoarders have a shorter life span then most people, not because of the filth they live in, but because of a lack of personal interaction with other people? How is this trend to replace phone calls and stopping by someone's house to see how they are doing with a text or a comment on Facebook going to effect the health of our generation? Not to mention the lack of an example to our children on how to be kind and loving towards others.

Everyone keeps asking me why I left Facebook. They say they feel bad I am out of the loop. My feeling is, I would rather feel out of the loop because I am not on there at all then feel out of the loop while I am on there because I just don't fit in. I like my friends, I enjoy hanging out with them and talking to them on the phone, but Facebook makes me acutely aware of how little my interests coincide with the people in my circle. I struggled with that before having it pointed out to me on an hourly basis on Facebook.

My biggest reason for leaving is I want to be a happier (ie, kinder, more spiritual, more involved, etc.) person and I feel leaving Facebook brings me a step closer to the kind of person I want to be.

A benefit of not being on it is, I have a lot more time in my day. I'm back to reading blogs, which I like. It's easy for me to find people I connect with on blogs. It's nice to feel like there are other people like me out there, even if I haven't been able to get to know any of them in person. 

Priorities, Part 2

"Do not spend money for that which is of no worth, nor your labor for that which can not satisfy."

I want my children to grow up knowing the gospel and having it a part of their daily study. That is one of the reasons homeschooling is so appealing to me. Homeschooling curriculum tends to focus around bible study. The scriptures say all things show evidence there is a God. Don't I want my children to make these connections while they are learning so it's a faith building experience versus learning in a public school that avoids God like a plague? (These websites are just ones that have ideas I like, maybe to build my own curriculum on.) http://bookofmormonstudyguide.com/

I long to have my children home with me. I love when they have friends and go play, but I dislike having someone else choosing what values my children learn. I don't like that the school sees my kids more often then I do. I don't like that I have very little control over the people my children have to interact with daily (on socialization).

Building Relationships http://raisingolives.com/2009/02/before-the-beginning/

I want to home school my children; I just don't know how to do it. http://www.hslda.org/laws/analysis/Utah.pdf http://www.all-about-spelling.com/spelling-products.html http://www.alabacus.com/

God in Schools

I've been reading up on homeschooling. One post I read recently was talking about why she doesn't want her kids in public schools partially because they are godless. The author has issue with the lack of pray, bible study, and discussions on God's truth and love.

While I agree with her about wanting my children to love the Lord and examine every situation in light of God's word, I don't want my children hearing what that Word is from just anyone.

For instance, lately we have been having a ton of missionaries visit our house from different faiths. I always welcome there discussions and let my kids come hear them talk, because I feel it's good to hear others talk about God somewhere other than our family's discussions and church, so long as I am there to hear what, exactly, is beings said. I want to know what my children are being taught so I can have a discussion with them later about differing points of doctrine and have the opportunity to correct any deviations from our faith they may hear.

If the public schools did teach gospel truths, whose "truths" would they be teaching? My family lives in a very Mormon area, and most likely it would be the same as they learn at home and at church, but I wouldn't know for sure unless I was there listening, which wouldn't be really an option in public schools. Thus, I am against having it in them.

However, I do feel spending 30 hours a week in a godless environment is counterproductive to my goal of centering my children in the gospel, and maybe not the best place for them to be.

Priorities

I have separation anxiety. Every time I go anywhere without my whole family, I worry about that being the last time I see them, or they see me. Even when I leave from visiting family, I worry about it.

Then I read about a family, Roscommon Acres, much like my own, trying to get through the death of their almost two year old and it kills me, because that could happen to us. I read about Raising Olives talk about her mother choosing what to do with the 6 months she has left to live after finding out she has cancer. She makes the point, "When you are faced with death your priorities are much more clear than during the daily grind of life."

When it comes down to it, aren't we all faced with death every day? The scriptures say we are in a state of probation. We are in a testing period and at the end of that period, we die. Shouldn't I be living my life with the priorities that stand out when faced with death?

One thing I have notice in reading Roscommon Achres is she rarely ever blogs about anything other than her children since the accident happened. It's like she's trying to get everything written down about them so she doesn't forget.

Looking back at my own blog, it's not the political views I find interesting to read, it's the stories of my children and family, the funny things they have done that, even just a few months later, I have forgotten. How often have I had that moment with one of my children and thought, "I'm taking a picture in my mind of this moment. I never want to forget it," but even just a few hours later I can't remember what that moment was.

I've been thinking about this a lot the last few month. My life, my family's life, has some changes to be made. I'm just still trying to discern what all those changes are.

The Luck of the Draw

It finally came in the mail this week- the Publisher's Clearing House registration form, I don't even know if that's the right name. I was just going to throw it away like I always do, but Grace saw it and asked if she could really win $5000 every week. I told her it wasn't likely, but she could fill out the form if she wanted to. She did and then asked what to do with it.

"You mail it in and then you'll be in a drawing and they will pick someone out to win the money."

"Maybe Scout should do it then, she's better at drawings then I am. I'm not very good."

"You probably won't win anyway, it's really not very likely."

That happened Wednesday, it took me until Friday to get what Grace was saying. She has no idea what a drawing is. She thought she would have to draw something and they would pick the best drawing. That's why she said Scout should do it, because she thinks Scout is a better artist then she is.

At the time, I had assumed she was talking about her luck at winning stuff. If you see it how Grace was thinking, I'm a huge jerk!

Banshees and Dimes

I blew up at my kids today. Scout has been so grumpy today. We went to the doctor this morning and the kids were really good- nice, happy, a little too loud for the waiting room, but I was willing to let them since they were all playing together so well. Then we left to go to a movie and she just ornery. Every time Grace or Abi said anything, she said they were wrong. She griped about listening to a book instead of music. She complained that I didn't tell her to bring money for her to buy stuff at the movie theater. She got mad I didn't have a quarter for her to put in the gumball machine. When the movie was over, it continued for the next three hours. She was given jobs (that I didn't end up following through with) and got lost her swimming rights during Max's lesson (that I ended up giving in and letting her have 1 minute after the other girls got in. ). In between all of this, right after getting after her she would act the perfect angel for a whole minute, then go right back to being a grump.

Meanwhile, the other girls are being pretty good. Grace snipped at Scout once is all, but when I told her to come here, instead of listening, she just kept asking, "Why?!" I hate that. "Because I told you to. Maybe after you do it I will answer, but you do what I say first!" Abi was surprisingly agreeable with both her sisters. But then it came to getting them out of the pool. I have talked to them every day this week about getting out when I tell them. I am just so tired of them not listening to me. I snapped, but had the decency to wait till the privacy of our car, for the most part.

"I'm sick of you not listening to me, ever! And I'm tire of hearing you fight with each other and me over every little thing. I try to do fun things with you and it makes me very angry when you are just so rude! I'm tired of you being rude to me when I am being a nice mom, so now you don't get nice mom anymore, you can have mean mom."

Grace- "What did I do?" Genuine question too, not the smart off version. And really, she didn't do much of anything, but I was already started. I had to finish right?

"You all are grounded for the rest of the weekend. You can clean or sleep. That's it! And if I hear a word of complaining while cleaning, you will go straight to bed. And if you don't go, I will spank your bum, hard. If you fight you will get more jobs, wait, no, you are already just doing jobs, so if you fight then you can go to bed. And I don't know if I am going to take you to swimming lessons next week." Not my finest speech.

Everyone was quite for the drive home. I told them to get their pjs on and do their jobs. When we got home, I told Grace that she didn't really do anything, I just want her to listen when I tell her to do something. She teared up and said ok.

Inside, they all got to work. Grace did everything she was supposed to and tried to help more by vacuuming all the rugs. Scout got mad at her for moving the rug to the living room to vacuum and started yelling at her. I told her to go to her room.

"Why?!"

"Go and then I will tell you."

"But I didn't do anything and you won't even tell me why!"

"Do what you are told!"

She stayed there saying the same things over and over until I moved over to spank her for not listening, like I said I would do. She glared at me and went upstairs.

Right after this yelling match with Scout, Abi, who is usually horrible at picking anything up, walked up to me with a dime she found while cleaning the living room.

With a big smile, she holds up her dime and asks, "Pay you for a kiss?"

I wonder how she could possibly want a kiss from me, being the banshee I've behaved like. "You never have to pay me for one of those."

I want to be a better parent. In the evenings, when I have time to myself, I look back at my day and see how little I have moved myself and my family toward my goal of "always abounding in good works, being led to glorify God." (Ether 12:4) How do you do it? How do you make the change?

Freezer Meals Recipes

It's days like these that 5:30 rolls around and I don't have any idea of what we can make for dinner (pancakes, again?) that I think, we could really use some freezer meals, or an extra $300 every month so we can go out to eat. I am starting to plan it out; these are my recipes. I haven't chosen a date yet to do it, maybe while Jared is out of town.

These recipes are set to make 3 meals for a family of 7. Since it will just be me, it will give me a total of 21 meals for my freezer.

Chicken Enchiladas

30 tortillas

5 lbs chicken

2 pt sour cream

3 lbs cheese (cheddar or Jack)

2 jars green salsa

1 bunch cilantro

Before cooking day

- cook and shred chicken

- grate cheese

- blend green salsa and cilantro till smooth

Cook day

- combine salsa and sour cream.

- spread small layer of sauce on bottom of pan

- fill tortilla with shredded chicken, then cheese, and sauce. Roll.

- Top with more cheese and sauce.

Eat day

- Thaw. Cook at 325 for 50 min, covered. Remove cover and cook for 10-15 more minutes.

- Side suggestion- serve with a fruit salad.

Indian Butter Chicken and Saag (makes 3 meals of each)

6 onions

6 tbl fresh ginger

12 cloves garlic

6 jalapenos

6 tbl oil

4 tbl garam masala

2 tbl chili powder

1 tbl coriander

48 oz tomato paste

12 c chicken broth

12 lbs boneless chicken

9 lbs spinach

6 c. half and half

Before cook day

- cube onions

- peel ginger and garlic

- seed jalapenos

- combine seasonings

- divide these in half

Cooking day-

- saute 1 batch onion mix with spinach, then blend with rest of ingredients except chicken. (saag)

- saute 1 batch onion mix alone, then blend with rest of ingredients except chicken. (butter chicken)

- mostly cook chicken cubes through, season with salt and pepper.

Eating day-

- Simmer, before serving add 3 Tbl butter and garnish with cilantro.

- Serving suggestion- rice and mango lassi

Basil Cream Pasta

2.5 lbs boneless chicken

red pepper flakes

1.5 onions

8 cloves garlic

3 c chicken broth

24 oz cream cheese

1/2 c parmesan cheese

Before cooking day

- cube chicken to 3/4" cubes

- grate parmesan cheese

- dice onions

Cooking day

- Season chicken with salt, pepper and red pepper flakes and saute with onions. Add garlic the last minute. Add rest of ingredients and simmer till smooth.

Eating day

- Thaw and heat in pan.

- Add 1/2 cup loose packed basil, chopped for last 5 minutes. (can use 1 tbl dried basil)

- Serve with noodles and a green salad

Stroganoff

3 lbs ground beef

2 onions

6 cloves garlic

45 oz cream of mushroom soup

45 oz golden mushroom soup

2 pts sour cream

Before cooking day

- dice onions

- brown ground beef and onions together, add garlic

Cooking day

- combine all ingredients

Eating day

- warm sauce in pan

- Serve with egg noodles or over baked potatoes or rice.

- Serving suggestion- serve with a cooked vegetable.

Meatballs

3 eggs

3/4 c milk

1 c oats

2 tsp salt

2 tsp sugar

3/4 tsp ginger

3/4 tsp nutmeg

3/4 tsp allspice

6 lbs ground beef or pork

3/4 c onion

Before cooking day

- dice onions

Cooking day

-combine all ingredients and shape into balls. Cook at 350 until juices run clear.

Eat day

- heat and eat. Use in spaghetti, meatball subs, etc.

Meatloaf

6 lbs ground beef

3 lbs sausage

1/4 c salt

1 heaping Tbl pepper

4 onions

10 eggs

5 cups oats

40 oz tomato sauce

1/3 c water (adjust if necessary)

4 bell peppers

2 lbs spinach

2 lbs mozzarella

Before cooking day

- dice onions, peppers and spinach

- shred mozzarella

Cook day

- combine everything except spinach and cheese. Layer that meatloaf with spinach and cheese.

- freeze raw.

Eating day

- thaw and cook at 350 for 1 hr 15 minutes

- Serving with potatoes and cooked vegetable (fresh rolls would be good too)

Book of Mormon in 90 Days

I really stink at ready my scriptures daily, and every time I go to start doing it, I am at a loss for where to start. So, I was reading the blog Raising Olives, and she was talking about doing the Bible in 90 days, which seems just insane and inspiring to me, but it did make me think that doing so with the Book of Mormon may get me out of my funk. I brought the idea up with Jared and found out he had been searching for his lost Kindle this last week so he could do the same thing. Last week, our bishop said there are no coincidences, just the Lord's hand in our lives. Apparently, this is what we need.

We decided that next year when we do this again (hopefully), we would have Scout do it with us. Ten years old seems like a good age for this, but when we were talking about it, both Scout and Grace said they wanted to do it, too. I don't know that they actually will, but as encouragement, I told them if they finished in 90 days, we would take them to Jason's Deli, which is their favorite place ever.

So if there is anyone out there that would like to join us, here is the schedule our family is following.

"We invite all men everywhere to read the Book of Mormon, to ponder in their hearts the message it contains, and then to ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ if the book is true. Those who pursue this course and ask in faith will gain a testimony of its truth and divinity by the power of the Holy Ghost." Introduction to the Book of Mormon

Name game

We are expecting our fifth child in October. When we found out we very quickly agreed on a name: Molly. We both loved it, it was a very easy decision. In fact, it was the fastest we have ever come to agreement on a name for one of our kids. By far.

The Ultrasound tech ruined this perfect moment of spousal collaboration, however. Molly isn't a very good name for a boy.

As ecstatic as I am about having another boy it leaves us in a bit of a predicament. We cannot agree on any boy names. This is due in part to the fact that both of us only have lists of about 4 or 5 names that we even like, but our lists don't match up. The other problem is most of the names we like we don't love. We just like them.

I don't know why boy names are so hard for us. We both love a whole bunch of girl names, and have difficulty coming up with any boy names we think are even just ok.

We've had long discussions, made lists, etc... But I don't feel like we're any closer to coming to an agreement on a name than we were when started.

Brittney's top choice right now is Peter.

Mine is either Oscar or Otis.

I won't list all the names we dislike, I don't want to offend anyone, but if anyone has any suggestions please feel free to chime in. Also, has anybody else had any experience with having extreme difficulty agreeing on a name for one of your children?

Off Topic: Movies I've been meaning to watch

I was looking for a movie to watch the other night, and I was having a hard time picking something. This in spite of the fact that I probably have at least a dozen movies that I really want to see and have been meaning to watch for months, if not years. I'm not sure why, but I do this all the time. I really want to read a particular book, or watch a particular movie, so I get it. Then it sits on the shelf for years, unused, while I read other books and watch other movies. Even though most of those others are pretty terrible things I didn't really care about.

So I thought I'd list a few of the top films I really want to see, that I have available to me, but I haven't watched yet for no good reason:

The Treasure of the Sierra Madre
Once Upon a Time in the West
High Noon
An Education
The African Queen

There are a lot more, but that's enough to start with.

Does anybody else have this problem? If so, please share your list.

P.S. We've decided to start blogging again. Facebook is lame.

I have a little room to improve.

Sometimes I wonder how my day would have gone differently if I had said my prayers after waking up and then actually tried to follow the Savior's example.

I wouldn't have tried to convince my 4 year old that pickles are a great breakfast when you are hungry, just because I didn't want to make her anything to eat.

I wouldn't have yelled at my little boy to go away so I could get some cleaning done when he just, as he puts it "want my mommies." Plus, when he did go away, I didn't clean.

I also would have taken the 5 minutes to repost the food assignments for an upcoming craft weekend after a friend requested it be reposted. Instead, I told her no because I didn't want to take the time and everyone is smart enough to look back themselves and figure it out. Then I spent the next 10 minutes reading people's post of how I really am not a jerk, I just come off that way.

One thing is for sure, I wouldn't have yelled out the door at my loving, great husband that he was being a real jerk this morning. A little ironic, huh?

Today was Scout and Grace's play, Alice in Wonderland.

It was exciting to see their personalities on the stage. Grace eats the attention up! She tries to act like she is embarrassed by the attention, but you can tell she loves it. She is so eager to get to her spot, to be where she is supposed to be and does everything with excitement.

Scout likes the attention too, but is way to "cool" to show it. She struts across the stage, taking her time to get into position. All of her movements are given with an air of "whatever, it's all the same to me."

The girls had a lot of fun doing the play. They are already talking about wanting to be in Rapunzel next year. We'll have to see. I honestly wasn't very impressed with the whole thing. I thought the show was very poorly done. They didn't even do the little things, like closing the back curtain so you don't see people running across the stage. I have to think there are some better acting classes to pay to have my kids in. The script didn't even make sense! I loved watching my kids in the play, but I thought the the show was really boring when they weren't in a main part.

Abi liked the show ok, but only made it through because she had 5 adults to talk to. (She just can't be normal for a picture, even her smiles are camera smiles and don't look anything like her real one. At least in her goofy pictures you can see her gorgeous, big brown eyes!)

Max only liked the songs. Those, he would sing all the words to and be loud enough we worried about him disrupting the people sitting by us. Then he would keep singing the songs after they were over till Jared made him stop. Cute little stink, isn't he?

Turns out, it wasn't his singing that disrupted the neighbors. He made his own game up where he would throw his shoe under the person's chair in front of us and then crawl under their legs to go get it out. At least he tried to be polite about it and kept loudly telling them "Sorry, sorry," over and over.

Eventually, he ended up running up and down the aisle in the back with his grandparents following him. It's a good thing we have Jared's parents at our kids recitals so we can actually get some pictures. I honestly don't know what we would do without them!